​My research collaborator, Dr. Marian Krawczyk of the University of Glasgow End-of-life Studies Group, and myself have recently published an open-access article on the research we did on the end-of-life doula (EOLD) role in four countries. There has been a lot of interest in this work, including a recent town hall with the International Federation on Aging. We are keen to discuss our findings with the broadest audience possible, particularly during the COVID-19 pandemic where end-of-life doulas are providing innovative services to address the myriad needs of families caring for dying individuals. 
 
We conducted 22 semi-structured interviews with key innovators and pioneers in the EOLD movement, five each from Australia, and the UK, and six each from Canada and the US. Some of the things I found most interesting about our findings are the broad range of descriptors of the EOLD role (see Table 2, below), the emphasis on community care and responding to the needs of the individual/family rather than imparting one’s own values, and the tension between mainstreaming EOLDs while preserving individuality and integrity as companion and advocate. More papers and more research will emerge from this data, including why the movement has gained such momentum, issues of professionality, standardization and regulation, women’s work, training, and much more. I hope you’ll read it and let me know what you think!
 

We all know that we live in a death-denying culture. ​Talking about and preparing for death is not something most people do. Here's a few pointers that I have learned from experience, that may help you do some self-examination and alter your approach to talking with others: I have learned:

• Most people do not think about death until they have to.
• Most people are afraid to talk about death because they fear what they don’t know, have no experience with death, or have unresolved grief around a loss.
• We need to accept and try to understand where people are coming from and ease into talking about death.
• If approached gradually by someone from within their own community who is understanding and gentle, many people will welcome new information that may be of use to them. 
• If we refrain from speaking negatively about cultural norms, our message is more likely to be heard and considered. Speaking negatively may lead to feeling judged.
• If people feel accepted or encouraged, they will more likely care about your message, trust you, and build a relationship with you.

​And after all that, be aware that:

• Most people will continue to not talk about death. Do not judge them for it.
• Accept that it is beyond the scope of your ability to change how our culture thinks and (doesn’t) talk about death.
• Simply be available to those who want to talk. 
• Hone your message and present it with integrity; speak from the heart.